Saturday, April 20, 2013

How Uday Chopra Ripped My Will To Live


Kitne kitno ko star banaya, apne bete ko star nahi bana paya”, quipped a chirpy RJ on a Bangalore radio station, referring to Yash Chopra’s inability to make a Bollywood sensation out of his own son after having ‘discovered’ many a faceless wonder. My little brain with its limited Bollywood knowledge tried to disagree because Aditya Chopra was as big as most mainstream Hindi actors but apparently, he wasn’t the son being ridiculed on radio. Enter Uday Chopra.



Way back in class 6, a certain multi-starrer flick had got the entire school drooling. “Aishwarya Rai comes like a ghost yaaa” was heard between numerous ‘ooh’s and ‘aah’s  directed at the leading men, all except one.  Over the next decade, the obliterated leading man made several appearances (quite understandably) in movies produced by daddy dearest. I am not of the opinion that looks make a good actor but Chopra Jr. was several notches below let-down in both departments. However, his lacklustre performances and a general deficiency of charisma were simply ignored, as were his repeated attempts to vie for the womankind’s attention against the likes of a certain John and a new Bachchan.  For all I cared, Chopra Jr. and I shared a live-and-let-live policy.

..until it was violated last week, when certain life-changing information was revealed to me. Enter Nargis Fakhri.





Now I share most Indian gentlemen’s sentiment that Nargis Fakhri isn’t hot, she’s the sun. Last week, I happened to gather that The Sun has found love in —wait for it— Chopra Jr. Without bringing up the argument if it indeed is love that is blind or if it is just Ms. Fakhri, I chose to look at the Chopra lad with a different point of view. Was there the smallest chance that he wasn’t as bad or undeserving as popular media made him out to be?


The time taken for fair evaluation could have been better utilized by helping my employer without expecting monetary compensation. She doesn’t even seem to be in it for the money, considering she’s probably made more dough from Rockstar than he has from his entire career. But I tend to drift. You must be wondering why I chose to bring up Bollywood and Page 3 this fine evening, a first in the seven years this blog has seen. Coming back again to the life-changing part of the revelation, the knowledge of a romantic relationship between these two has made me ask myself an important question: if all The Sun could manage to bag was a sub-par Chopra, what’s the best this lesser mortal can get..in a world where even Ritesh Deshmukh is taken?

The options:

a)



b)



I don’t even have the heart to come up with Option C. Kindly use the comments section below to vote/suggest.